My dresser is dust free and the top is very organized and dust-free. But if you open a drawer, nothing is in a straight line. The top may be neatly folded because of putting away laundry, but the stuff I don't wear as often underneath the folded stuff is inside-out or crumpled messily or stuffed into corners so I can close the drawer.
Today I Swiffered underneath the bed and found four of my socks I took off during the night with the full intention of picking them up in the morning, but never seen or remembered.
My saving grace in my head is the mantra "Well, at least I'm not as bad as my husband," which is a terrible way to think of it! But I had to admit to myself that I will always have a messy streak.
I do, however, find a certain satisfaction (or schadenfreude, actually) in watching "How Clean is Your House?" on BBC America. In case you haven't had the pleasure of watching it, Kim Woodburn and Aggie Mackenzie are two "neat freaks", if you will. They surprise (as far as Reality TV lets you imagine, at least) slobs in their homes and open their eyes to just how disgusting they've been living. Then, with their decorated rubber gloves and English accents, they show the homeowners how to clean their house. I wouldn't have thought of this premise as a great idea for a reality show, but it's very addicting. And I get my "fix" almost every day because BBCA apparently knows it's a good show, so my DVR has at least two episodes waiting for me when I get home from work--some of them are repeats, but they're always fun to watch again.
Well, I've gotten so addicted to this show (in my effort to become the Grand Puba of Full-Time Career Girl/Housewife), that I found their book, "The Cleaning Bible", on Amazon and bought it immediately. Well, I can't even begin to tell you how clean my house is right now.
Hell, I'll let the review I posted at Amazon do the talking for you:
"I've recently gotten addicted to 'How Clean is Your House?' on BBC America. So much so that when I finish watching an episode, I start cleaning until my husband stops me or I have to go to bed or work. I have gotten so into the show, I now picture miniature versions of Kim and Aggie on my shoulder with their wit and wisdom as I'm scrubbing away at my bathroom or kitchen.
When I found they wrote a book, I ordered it immediately, and even got Amazon Prime so I could enjoy it sooner. I've had it for a few days now and I can't say I've made much of a dent in the book. This is because I will read a few pages, then put it down to clean something. There's something about them that makes me want to clean and convinces me that I actually enjoy it somehow.
We moved into a house built in 1928 last year, and we've torn the wall-to-wall carpets up and re-finished the hardwood floors underneath; taken the wallpaper down and painted; re-wired the kitchen; and basically had to start from scratch with this house. From all that work, cleaning seemed like such a chore, especially if we were to work on a new project that would inevitably make a mess. But now it's not so daunting.
Maybe it's the thought of Kim saying, 'And look how it sparkles, dear! You wouldn't have known it could do that before, now, did you?' Or Aggie saying, 'You only need a cap-full of bleach, dear, not the whole bottle!'
Either way, because of these two wonderful women, I get a kick out of cleaning and my home has been spotless for about two weeks (since becoming addicted to the show). My husband, who is probably 'quite a filthy little beggar' in Kim's mind, is happier as well because I haven't been complaining as much about cleaning. (Don't get the wrong impression of him--he helps out more, and from watching the show, I've noticed his complaints about cleaning are becoming few and far between.)
The best thing I have to say about the book AND the show is the Mother-in-Law test. She came over this afternoon for coffee, and was stunned at how clean everything was. I wasn't even expecting her and I had no doubt when she pulled in the driveway that everything would be to her liking. I was even able to give her some tips I picked up from the show and the book!
I can't say enough about this book or the two wonderful women who wrote it. It's not even something you have to read before cleaning--the personal stories they put in make the book easy to read before going to bed or lounging around the house (when you run out of stuff to clean...or so you think).
As a childhood fan of Mary Poppins, these two women are probably the closest I'll ever have to having someone say 'spit-spot' and snapping their fingers and it's clean."
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