...or, at least they're universal to me.
1. Signals are on the car or a reason.
Or, at least they're on the less expensive cars sold outside Fairfield county. Apparently, if you own a Mercedes, Lexus, Bentley, or anything that costs more than $60,000, signals are an option that aren't available on even the most expensive models, I guess. Right? Am I wrong? I've never been in one. I drive a Kia and can't imagine not letting other drivers around me know where I'm going. Oh, and doing so before I put on my brake lights is an Amendment to this Universal Truth.
2. Dick Wolf should be considered a form of torture.
Oh, but it's sooo good. It's like, my husband and I watch an episode of "Law & Order: SVU" and we're always on the edge of our seats for all 60 minutes, than when we get attached to the characters and the stories and Dick Wolf twists our arms and as soon as we see the black screen with his name, we exclaim, "Damn you, Dick Wolf!" Immediately after, we search for another DVR'ed episode we haven't seen, as if to say, "Thank you, sir, may we have another!"
3. If we just sit down to dinner, the phone will ring, and it won't be for me.
No matter how late we eat, my husband will get a call from someone. It will only end when I'm finished eating and it's time to clean up. But, then again, I hate the phone so I'm not that perturbed when it's not for me.
4. If I wake up late, I will either be low on gas or cigarettes.
This means I will hold myself up having to get them on my way to work, making myself feel even more late. If I wake up early, I will have an adequate amount of both gas and cigarettes, then I'll have to find ways to kill time so I won't get to work super early and the day will drag.
5. If I'm doing laundry, the shirt/pants/underwear I'll want to wear that day will be in the washer or dryer at that moment.
It's just inevitable. I may not even think I have worn it in the past two weeks, but somehow it will end up in my laundry and I'll have to do some last minute planning on an outfit.
6. If I've been tired all day and can genuinely see myself easily taking a nap when I get home, plans will pop up and we will end up being out late.
It's very rare I'm tired at work and not get my second wind on the ride home, simply because I'm not at my desk anymore. But the days I can't keep myself awake on the ride home, I know I'll be coming home to company and/or we'll end up going out somewhere.
7. If I've found I've lost weight (seemingly overnight), I'll be starving the whole day.
I'll end up eating whatever and whenever I want to that day as a sort of "reward", bringing my weight back up to what it previously was sans miracle overnight success. Oh, and it'll all be crap, too.
8. If I play hookie and take a sick day, I will get sick the next week.
I would feel badly for taking a sick day when I wasn't really sick and go to work, looking terrible. Although, this works in my favor sometimes; it gives my boss a chance to see what I'm like when I'm sick, therefore assuming I must have been even worse the week before. The phrase "trouper" comes into play. However, being sick still sucks, especially when I feel too guilty to lie in bed all day like I would like to.
9. It is a bad idea to buy more than one book at a time.
Once I get the two books, I can never decide which one to read first. It has gotten to the point where I end up not reading either. Or, I'll decide on one and mid-way through, I'll wonder if I decided to read the "wrong" book first, put it down and start the second, and never get back to the first because my mind has already been somewhere else for too long and I don't want to start over.
10. I only notice how anti-social I can be when an elevator is present.
I don't get uncomfortable easily. If I do, the feeling usually passes quickly. However, whenever I have to share an elevator with someone I'm not familiar with, I get all sorts of flustered. I'll have just gotten in the elevator and if I here someone coming, I'll press the Door Close button as quickly and as stealthily as possible to avoid sharing the elevator. It's a confined space and what will have been 15 seconds seems to last hours sometimes, especially if I've just come back from a cigarette and I can only imagine what the poor soul sharing this 3x3 space with me is thinking as they smell the tobacco on me. When I get to my floor and the doors open up, it's like a weight's been lifted off my shoulders.
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